Truth...or a reasonable facsimile thereof?

[Zen Benefiel]

Aka…The meaning of life?

What is truth? Is it objective, subjective, all inclusive or mutually exclusive? Does it apply even when we deny it? Do we have the capacity to know it with our senses? Are we greater beings under limitations of modern science and spirituality? How about cosmic truth? Are we alone or preparing for a family reunion?

I like to explore possibilities and include some hopefully relevant personal experiences. My adoptive parents told me my IQ was off the scale as an elementary student, but not until my early 30s. Maybe life would have been different had I really known. I became comfortable being a deep thinker with a somewhat brilliant mind. Now it often seems I know nothing and at times...

I was adopted by a wonderful couple who are still together after nearly 60 years (a feat in itself). My childhood was normal by most standards, although I found later that love and trust were not consistent elements elsewhere. There were other exceptions before I was even 10 years old, with early out of body experiences and regular nightly excursions where I watched myself ascend into an orange cigar-shaped cloud. I placed no importance on these excursions, just that I couldn't wait until the next one. I did not speak of them to my parents as I had been invalidated through an earlier experience.

Moving through puberty I excelled in academics and sports in high school, but fell into some questionable activities in college trying to regain a place I visited during a meditation. I was taken into a brilliant white light and beyond, told what I was here to do and allowed to re-enter my body. I lost my fear of death and attempted to get back to the light through psychotropics. After buying a couple of sets of drums the following year, I moved out of the honors dorm and into some deplorable living conditions, without my parent's knowledge.

The conditions didn't last long as I was accosted at a fraternity house, taken to the hospital, and spent the next six weeks on a psychiatric ward. My only claim to 'sanity' was eventually learning what the psychiatrist needed to hear to deem me 'healed,' even though I had to suppress what I really wanted to discuss. The metaphysical experiences were the precursors to the rest of my explorations and all I wanted was some clarification, not condemnation and categorization. I felt a great sense of loss through seeking open communication with a ‘professional’ and being discarded without so much as a moment of possible comprehension from them.

The experiences were very real, however uncommon and unique to the masses. They were chronicled through similar instances in many different books in the ‘metaphysical’ category as I sought confirmation of my sanity. Fast forward a couple of decades or so, through a marriage and divorce with four children and now 6 grandchildren; low to mid-level positions in various corporate environments (aerospace to sales and marketing), a couple of master's degrees in business, secondary teaching, hypnotherapy and life coach certifications; I now consider myself an eduholic and quite qualified to admit I know nothing. And yet...

[Tom Flower]

Keep it up Zen. You are writing some good stuff. You are right ...Love is the gig we all have to be. Love and forgiveness. Gotta learn to love our own shadow and own it.